Snow

Snow. White. Pure. Clean. Bright.

I feel like snow is what I need right now. A washing, a cleansing. Purifying me and my life of all that is hard, dark, heavy...

Why God. Just Why.

Please let there be snow for Christmas this year. Let there be snow not only on the ground, but let what snow represents be in the lives of those I love. We need cleansing, purifying, and your redemption. There is so much evil, so much darkness, so much hate, so much filth on so many levels in the world. Purify us!

Snow.

"so go DOWNTOWN. things will be great when you're DOWNTOWN..."

Today was one of the best days I've had in Haiti! First off, my next door ROOSTER didn't wake me up this morning at 4 am--definitely getting off to a good start. Next, today is my day off, which means I get to hang out with the awesome people downstairs (i.e. other people who work here but I don't get to hang out with on a regular basis). Then, I walked to the grocery store and got food (I love food). After that, one of our Haitian friends came over and we got Ashley a new phone. And the BEST part is next: the two of us, me and my friend Frantzdy, took a bus downtown and bought my family Christmas gifts (To be read in a sing-songy voice) in downtown PaP. That was really fun--bartering and looking at all the artifacts. Then he gave me a mini tour of the monuments and such; during part of the tour we sat on a playground in one of the parks and chatted. We decided to walk around a bit more and then looked for a bus to take us back to Petionville, however, it was really hard to find one as they were either full or were not going the right direction.  Soooo, we started walking back to Pville. By the time we were barely out of downtown area, we realized that it was dark and that Pville really is quite a ways to walk...so we hopped on a motorcycle taxi and came home.

It was really quite exciting and I feel so much more Haitian now!

BUT what I'm REALLY excited about is my Christmas gifts for my family!! Can I just say that this Christmas is going to be the BEST CHRISTMAS EVAAARRR!!!! I get to see my family AND give them cool Haitian things. :) I'm so excited!!!

Musings

I just want to eat Haiti. I feel this so strongly sometimes. I desire to experience it more, deeply, soak in everything that is Haitian. This is the first time I’ve ever tackled living in another country, it takes time to soak up experiences. Even back in the States when I experienced something new, I felt the same thing but nothing was as big as a completely new country with a different culture and language. Speaking about language, I realized that I can and will speak Kreyol as I am, speak it from me, coming from who I am. I will choose my words as I do in English—I don’t talk like everyone else—I choose my own lingo and define things my own way. I am free to do and will do the same in Kreyol. In that way, I’m glad I look different. I speak from who I am. Speaking of looking different, I am blan. Not necessarily color as it was explained to me by Yvelyne and Glaphira when Glaphira said “Sak pase, Blan?” to me in the DR. Rather, Blan means an open mind.  I am open minded and that will never change the more I become part of Haitian culture or the more American I am. I am becoming more secure and aware of who I am and not being afraid to admit it, own it, express it without apology.

Actually, if I think about it, I want to eat God, I want to eat Life. To experience it, to live it fully, to taste it, feel it, let it fill me and change me.

GOD!! I WANT TO LIVE!!! Nothing has consumed me with my passion to Live, to really truly live. To Live is Christ. It is experiencing God and nothing less that will fulfill that desire to Live!!

I want to SAY. By the time I leave Haiti, I want to be able to Say, to truly be Alive. To not be afraid of who I am. To be able to express my thoughts. To say. Maybe someday I will learn to speak, to express, to say.

GOD! Let me experience you! You are Life. In you is Life. Apart from you I can do nothing. I can know nothing. Apart from you is death, whether or not I have the breath of life. AGAIN, LORD! Let me experience YOU!!!

O Come, Emmanuel

Come, Emmanuel-listen while you read 

O Come, COME, Emmanuel!!

And ransom me. Redeem me. Abide with me, Thou Great Jehovah.

God with us. 

Please take time to consider this great miracle. 

Is this our plea?? Is this your heart's cry, my beloved ones? It must be or we have no life at all. In Him is Life and apart from Him you are nothing. NOTHING. You do not possess even yourself: breath, body, friends, family, possessions. 

                                  

                                   God with us.

Does this amaze you? Does it cause you to fall on your face in reverence, in gratitude--deep, heart-throbbing gratitude? If it does not, take time to consider where you would be without the great miracle of God becoming flesh, dying for sins he didn't commit, and becoming alive after dying! Or perhaps consider where you are, in your desperate need for Him. If that is where you are, oh loved one, call out to HIM!! Echo with the song

                                   O Come O COME, Emmanuel!!